Social scientists in the past two decades have clearly stated that human values matter when it comes to defining and managing your measure of personal success. Brene Brown talks about the importance of vulnerability in defining success; Angela Duckworth speaks about grit; Adam Grant writes about rethinking strategies. All of these social scientists rely on the importance of connecting with others as a measure of self-worth and success. Robert Waldinger has a TEDTalk describing the Harvard Study on Longevity— a near one- hundred-year study of what leads people to live long and productive lives.  The conclusion of the study points to the lasting influence of connecting with others.

Generosity and kindness count.  This is not to say that every student needs to express kindness in every way possible, but rather personal satisfaction is a result of connection to others.  From the angst of Ebenezer Scrooge to the regrets expressed by a parent not to become the wealthiest body in the graveyard, we have daily reminders of the importance of generosity in defining who we are as humans.

Teachers need to be careful not to evaluate an action of kindness, but rather the disposition of kindness. Students may not follow the plan teachers determine for showing generosity, but this doesn’t mean that generosity is absent.  An important part of teaching generosity has to be in discussing with children, the actions that they view as generous in nature.  We need to convince our children that generosity counts.

Teachers can have significant discussions about what makes a person generous, but actions invariably come down to personal situations.  Thus, my sense is that generosity should be a single character report card entry, “shows generosity”, and that teachers need to be clear with children the times they have seen or not seen generosity in the classroom.  Generosity can be subjective, but a defining element of childhood is that children are not yet fully equipped with the skills to manage their lives.   The more time we spend on critical issues of life management, the more likely we will have a significant impact.

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Coming Next Wednesday- How to Grade for Persistence

 From our first posting:

“As parents and teachers, we need to reclaim our traditional role as influencers of our children – not by shouting louder than the influencers our children discover online, but by stressing ideas that are more important than fancy shoes and snappy TikTok tunes. We need to emphasize traits that everyone agrees children will honor.  We need to convince our children that the people who are most important to them have a better understanding of what it takes to be successful in life.”

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