(Excerpt from Chapter One of the book, Traits for Success)

1. All students are bright and capable.   Even the most intellectually challenged students had gifts to bring to the table. Though there are clearly students with greater intellect, success in the classroom never seemed grounded in intellect alone. Early on, it became clear that our primary goal was to graduate students of character.

2. Teaching is not about pouring book-loads of information into empty minds but about motivating students to use their natural skills to seek success.  Teaching, for me, was a job that demanded patience, humor, and discipline, but above all, I found that it demanded imagination. I was given the freedom in schools to create opportunities for my students to grow wings and fly.

3. Hard work and passion eclipsed talent/intellect all of the time in the classroom. In independent schools, I had more than a fair share of bright students who were indifferent to the demands of striving with their best efforts. But more surprising was the number of less intellectual students who succeeded spectacularly. This reality began to shape my thinking about how we reinforce these values in schools and at home.

4. We should equip children with the internal values to explore self-discovery and move to adulthood. We need to elevate the conversation about school success. It is not solely about academic feedback and the external rewards of grades. School success should also be about the internal values and character that drive each child to achievement. We should aim to influence our children to value character, not to detract from intellectual achievement, but rather to elevate character’s role in choosing direction and purpose.

5. If positive values could be ingrained in children from the start, then the chances of success in school and later in life would be astronomically increased. Ultimately, our job in kindergarten through eighth-grade schools was to prepare our students for high school and life success. This was not a question about teaching them the intellect to achieve, but rather, teaching them the values to explore life successfully.

6. School success demands a full community effort from teachers, administrators, parents, and students. This is a secret I learned from working closely with parents who were raising successful children. These parents focused on school values and actively promoted them at home. Most often, dinnertime was an event of important conversational guidance. Schools needed to attach themselves to the conversations that were already succeeding in the homes of successful students.

7. By focusing so exclusively on academic grades, schools today give children the notion that outstanding academic grades are the ultimate rewards of the system. So, it should be no surprise that many students graduate feeling less than successful. Moreover, accumulating good grades in school becomes the first step to accumulating other material items after graduation that serve as the external rewards of success rather than the internal rewards of happiness, joy, or satisfaction. This is not to say that academic grades, wealth, or material accumulation has no value, but rather that our definitions of success need to be more aspirational.

8. Once a child leaves school, there is still plenty of time to draw success from failure (or failure from success). None of these student stories are completed yet, and failure or success at such a young age does not augur continued repetition. However, our children will first need to see beyond the illusion of academic success or failure learned in their school years before they can understand what life success and failure look like.

9. In my experience, the prevailing focus in schools today on intellectual growth has been destructive to the fabric of our American society. We need to develop successful citizens who lead with character, not intellectual gymnastics. We must challenge our children to move beyond the current generation of adults who too often argue about issues without regard for probity.